Now that we have both a pre-teen and a teen at home, my husband and I have started to be more intentional about teaching our boys basic life skills. The years are flying by fast and college for our oldest is now only four short years away. So, we want to make sure both of our boys have the ability to tackle specific life skills on their own, so they can grow to be independent young men. Plus, it’s a good way for older kids to learn responsibility and how to do things for themselves.
Below are 15 basic life skills we are teaching our boys and tips on how to teach your kids too. Please don’t feel like you need to teach your kids these all at once. Spread them out, take you time, and do them at your own pace.
And remember, give yourself and your child(ren) grace as you teach and they learn. We all learn and grow at different paces, so if some skills take longer to learn, that’s OK. As long as you are doing them together and your child is learning.
1. Laundry
It doesn’t get more basic than this. We taught both our boys the proper way to load laundry into the washing machine, paying close attention not to overload it. We also showed them where/how to put the detergent in, how to select which cycle to use for specific loads, and how to start the machine.
They also know how to separate clothes by color (darks/lights). Then we showed them how to put it in the dryer and choose the length of time for drying, based on how heavy each load is (clothes, towels, large or small loads, etc.). Since we make our own homemade laundry detergent, we’ve also taught them how to do that.
2. Cleaning the House
We all live in our house, so we all help keep it clean. Showing your kids how to clean the house doesn’t have to be an arduous task. If you go room by room, little by little, it’s not so bad.
If you teach your kids how to dust, vacuum and sweep, that will set them up for cleaning any room in your house. Bathrooms and kitchens require a bit more elbow grease and special cleaners for specific areas. But remember, you don’t have to teach them all in one day. Split it up over the course of a week, taking one room/task at a time.
3. Making Their Bed
Studies have shown that living in a neat/clean environment helps a person feel less stressed and overwhelmed. The bedroom is one such space where this proves to be true. Especially since pre-teens and teens tend to spend a lot of time in their rooms. So, giving them the tools to keep their space neat and tidy will help reduce stress and let them enjoy their environment even more.
Now, if you have a child with a loft bed, like we do, that might make it a little trickier. It’s hard for me to change that bed, let alone my son who is shorter than I am. So what we did instead was show him how to make up the futon in our guest room. Anytime we have company, it’s his job to make that up.
4. Mowing the Lawn/Landscaping
While your pre-teens/teens may not own a home with a yard all their own to mow each month, it’s still a valuable skill to have. Mowing lawns in your neighborhood is a great way for kids to earn a little extra money. And, who knows, they may even turn it into a business one day!
You’ll have to gauge for yourself if you feel your kids are ready to mow the lawn. This could be determined by factors such as the size of your yard, if you have a push mower or a riding mower, and your child’s strength (takes some muscles to push those things!). But it’s a skill they will use for life.
In addition, teaching them simple landscaping skills will also set them up for future success. Show them how to plant plants/flowers, how to trim bushes, composting, weeding, etc. These are also things they could do to earn money later on.
5. Cooking/Making Their Own Lunch
I practically grew up in the kitchen with my Italian family. So, naturally, my boys have been helping me in the kitchen since they were little. I’d have them do small things like adding ingredients to the mixer, spreading pizza sauce on the dough, etc. But now that they are older, I want them to learn how to cook a full meal. They’ll need to know how to cook for themselves when they go to college, and for the rest of their lives.
You can break down cooking into smaller parts. Start by having them help you make a meal by reading you the step-by-step recipe instructions. Show them how to measure ingredients, turn on the oven and stove, and work them up to cooking on their own. You can start with simple things like scrambled eggs and even how to make toast.
Along with this, they are now old enough to pack their own lunches for school. Have them make their own sandwiches, throw in snacks from the pantry, and fill their water bottles. Easy!
6. Taking Care of Pets
This is another great one to work on responsibility. Pets require a lot of care and can teach children some great life lessons. Why not have your teens/pre-teens be in charge of pet care? Let them feed your animals, take the dog for a walk, clean the litter box/fish tank/bird cage, give the dog a bath, etc.
7. Order for Themselves at a Restaurant
Believe it or not, this one can be a big deal. If your kid is shy, even as a teenager, this will help boost their confidence and give them the ability to speak up for themselves more. When I was a teen my mom would have me call our local Chinese restaurant to place our dinner order. I hated it. BUT it really helped me come out of my shell more and learn how to do this basic life skill.
My son has life-threatening food allergies, so it’s especially important for him to know how to order food in a restaurant. He watched me do it for years, and now he is able to do it all on his own. Makes me proud to see him advocating for himself.
8. Read Food Labels
Speaking of things that are important for food allergies…reading food labels on packaging is another important life skill. Yes, it’s extremely important for those with food allergies or other dietary restrictions, but it’s also a great skill for all teens/pre-teens.
Reading food labels teaches kids about serving sizes, how much sugar certain foods contain, what are healthy vs. non-healthy ingredients, where foods come from, and can even teach them about the manufacturing companies themselves. There’s a lot to learn in those labels!
9. Checking Out Books at the Library
This is one they are going to need their whole life. If they aren’t checking out books for themselves for school or to read for fun, it’ll be for their own kids one day. Our public library systems in Columbia are fantastic! Not only can you get your child their own library card and teach them how to check out books on their own, but they can also learn how to do research, get resume help, attend a “maker” session, hear lectures, and more! So many opportunities to learn important skills!
10. Mail Letters/Bills
You may have read that title and said to yourself, “no one mails that stuff anymore.” I know. I get it. But, despite the fact that we live in a VERY digital age, there are still times we need to send items through good ‘ol snail mail. Whether it’s mailing a bill, a birthday card, or sending a care package to a loved one, this is a skill that all kids should learn.
11. Changing a Tire
This is something I never actually learned how to do myself, but I wish I had. Yes, I have AAA who can do it for me (thank God for AAA!), but there have been a couple of instances when it would have been a much faster resolution if I had just known how to change the tire myself.
My son is only five months away from being old enough to get his learner’s permit. With the track record I’ve had with flat tires (you wouldn’t believe me if I told you the number…), I want to make sure both of my boys know how to change a flat tire in case they find themselves in an unexpected situation.
I LOVE AAA, but sometimes it can take over an hour for someone to get to you. If my son is on the side of the road and isn’t in the safest area, I want him to be able to get out of there as fast as possible. That’s where this specific life skill will come in very handy.
12. Simple Home Repairs
I’m not saying you need to teach your kid how to put up drywall and sheetrock. But knowing how to do things like put a nail in the wall to hang a picture, unclog a toilet, change a lightbulb, put batteries in the smoke alarms, and tighten a loose screw on a piece of furniture, will all come in very handy.
13. Basic First Aid
When your kids are pre-teens and teens, they don’t necessarily need to know a lot of First Aid, but basic skills are helpful. My boys know where we keep the Band-Aids, Neosporin, and Hydrogen Peroxide. So, if they get hurt, they can clean their wound and bandage it on their own.
We are a big camping family, so we’ve also talked to our boys about treating slightly larger cuts/scrapes, poison ivy, and bee/wasp stings. If you’re not comfortable teaching your kids these skills yourself, check out your local YMCA or similar organizations to see if they offer any First Aid classes.
14. Call 911
If your children are pre-teens and teenagers, that means they are old enough to be left home alone. Unfortunately, things can happen. Whether it’s to themselves, their siblings, or an elderly grandparent living in the home. Knowing how to call 9-1-1 is not just a basic life skill, it’s a life-saving skill.
The first thing I tell my kids about calling 9-1-1 is that it is NOT like what you see on TV. On television, the operator always answers with, “9-1-1 WHAT is your emergency.” When you call yourself, the first thing they actually ask is WHERE is your emergency. That’s because the person who answers the phone will then transfer you to someone else who handles your area.
Then, that next operator will ask what the emergency is. That is a big difference that is important to understand. Along with this, make sure your kids have your home address memorized so they can easily give the address to the 9-1-1 operator.
15. How to Handle Money
There are a lot of different things to teach your kids when it comes to money. Once they become a teenager, they will soon be getting a job. That means they will need to know about bank accounts, using a debit card, how to use an ATM machine, how to leave a tip at a restaurant, when to save and when to spend.
There are so many life skills we can teach our children! These are just a sprinkling of them. Below are some additional resources for life skills to teach your children. Click on each title for more information. I hope these resources serve you as well as they have me!
- 100 Life Skills You Can Teach Your Kids in 5 Minutes or Less
- The Lazy Genius Podcast Episode #414: What I Hope My Kids Know When They Move Our
- The Lazy Genius Podcast Episode #379: How to Help Kids Clean Their Room
- Safe Hugs Blog: 100+ Essential Life Skills For Kids
