We’ve all heard “it takes a village” when raising a family. When I first heard this saying, I imagined a life in which I could take my newborn baby home to a house filled with relatives; aunts, cousins, and grandparents all eager and willing to help with the childcare and household chores. Perhaps I could get the sleep I desperately needed after the marathon of childbirth. Perhaps I could have someone cook me a meal. Perhaps this meal could even be brought to me while I lay comfortably in bed with my newborn baby sleeping soundly in my arms.
Then I had a huge reality check.
With the arrival of my first born, I was completely isolated. We had no family close-by, and my husband had to go back to work within a few days of our return home from the hospital. I was alone, I was scared, and I was so tired. I couldn’t even have any family come from out-of-town because within a month of my son’s birth the world shut down due to Covid. I went into survival mode. Looking back now on those first weeks to months of motherhood, it was a blur.
With my second baby, I was determined to have a different experience.
I was determined to feel supported instead of isolated, to feel rested instead of sleep deprived, and to relish the newborn experience rather than simply survive it. The problem was, I still didn’t have any family who lived nearby. That’s when I turned to the local community’s resources and found Bundle and Bliss. This company, founded by Lucy Blair, provides doulas to support mothers in their postpartum days. Although I was a bit hesitant to have someone I didn’t know care for me and my baby, I was open to trying something that could help me be a better and more present mother.
After chatting with Lucy and setting up a time to meet the doulas who would be helping me, I immediately felt a sense of relief and excitement. I elected to have a doula help me during the nighttime so I could get some more sleep. I decided to have her come for eight days spread out during the first four weeks in addition to having a daytime doula come once a week. I looked down at my baby bump and whispered to her, “It’ll be different this time.”
And it was completely different…
Although I still woke up to breastfeed, the nighttime help allowed me to return to sleep quickly without staying awake for diaper changes, burping, and rocking my baby back to sleep. I woke up in the morning feeling so much more rested and renewed for the next day. I looked forward to the nights when I had this help from my doula. She was an enormous comfort to me, providing advice when I asked, and encouragement when I needed it most. I felt 100% confident in her taking care of my baby.
The daytime doula was also so helpful. I wasn’t exactly sure what I would want help with initially during the daytime, but it turned out that having someone who could help me with my toddler while I nursed and cared for my newborn was a lifesaver. I also got to spend some alone time with my toddler, who was having a hard time in his new big brother role. In addition to the childcare help I received, they also washed dishes, did laundry, made some delicious food, and even offered to walk our dog, who was always eager for a neighborhood stroll.
Now, two months into life with my second baby, I can look back on the newborn days with fondness and a sense of gratitude. Bundle and Bliss not only provided me with the caring and helping hands I needed, but they gave me a lasting memory of those early postpartum days that I no longer describe as a blur but as a blissful time in motherhood.
